Iron Men Of The Month

| May/June 1972


union city, INDIANA

Ike and Mike, they look alike,
So do Dennis and Dwight.
No one can tell them apart
Either in daytime or at night.

The teacher calls on Dennis
And up pops Dwight to recite.
Mom yells for Dennis
When Dwight hoves in sight.

And poor Pop has spanked Dennis
When he should a paddled Dwight.
Hard to figure which one is wrong,
And which one is right.

'I would be a real tizzy 'n twirl,
If both boys wooed the same girl.
The only 'female' they ever chase
Is a slim-boilered gal named 'Case.'

Yes, it's mighty lucky for the rest of the human race that the Seman twins, Dennis and Dwight, have so far courted no other love than a trim little 12-horse Case. Lucky, we say, because of the frustrations that might otherwise develop should they ever go a-court in' gals that aren't made of mere iron and steel. Such as for instance the mix-ups that might ensue should they ever double-date and finally wind up with problems of 'Who was loving whom?' Or, with neither gal knowing exactly who was who may be Dennis's gal falling in love with Dwight and Dwight's gal wind up kissing Dennis. The ramifications being so frightful to foretell, there is even the distinct possibility that both gals could wind up loving the same fellow without knowing whether 'twas Dennis or Dwight. And that wouldn't be right.